If you asked me what scanxiety was prior to my diagnosis, I would have responded with a confused look on my face. SCANXIETY? What does that even mean?? The tough reality is that we all experience this at some point after being diagnosed with cancer. Fear and anxiety at the thought of another scan. The [...]
Author: smilethroughthefog
Out with the old, in with the foobs
Never in a million years did I think that my regular vocabulary would include things like breast cancer, reconstruction, expanders, and that I would have to “shop” for the right size and shape breasts to replace my own. But here I am six weeks post implant exchange surgery. After waiting 5 months for my body [...]
Expanders, foobies, frankenboobs, rocks, boulders…what do you call them?
Expanders, foobies, frankenboobs, rocks, boulders. These are just a few of the names for tissue expanders coined by other breast cancer survivors. After the mastectomy and lat flap reconstruction, it was an adjustment period getting used to these new foobies. I felt like I was walking around like a robot at times because the circumference [...]
Bye Bye Boobies!
After months of anticipation, countless meal prep, cleaning of the house and trying to get myself in the best shape possible, the big day was finally here for my bilateral mastectomy with immediate latissimus dorsi flap reconstruction. I had been called by the hospital admitting department the day prior to instruct me to be at [...]
Reflections
Throughout the years, I have struggled with confidence and self love. I developed quickly as a young girl and became very insecure about my breasts and my body. My mind distorted the way I looked at myself, fixating on its flaws and feeling the constant need to live up to an expectation that didn’t exist. [...]
Reconstruction zone ahead
Feel it on the First! Early detection is key! Despite going through surgery and treatments over the last 10 months, I have struggled with the uncertainty that I am “cancer free” moreso after the news from my oncologist in December. He had another pathologist look at my case and discovered there were a few [...]
Waking Up is Hard to Do
From the moment I wake up in the morning, my mind is already running a million miles a minute thinking about all the little aches and pains all over my body. Anxiety, fear and worry build up inside myself before I’ve even opened my eyes. Was that pain there yesterday? Is this something new? Has [...]
Radiation
One thing I’ve learned through treatment is to just go with the flow. Nothing remains the same. Ever. I was originally supposed to have surgery to remove more lymph nodes once I was finished chemo. Upon meeting with my surgeon however, the plan changed to focus on my primary cancer treatment first – chemo and [...]
Bone pain, hot flashes, fatigue…oh my!
For the second half of my treatment, I was switching over to a chemo drug called Paclitaxel which was given intravenously over the course of 4.5 hours. Some of the more common side effects included bone pain, muscle pain, neuropathy (tingling of the fingers and toes), and fatigue but no nausea! I was one happy [...]
Dancing with the Devil
Going into the second round of chemo, my GP oncologist advised me that I would be getting a double dose of anti-nausea medication moving forward to help alleviate the nausea that I experienced through the first treatment. This seemed to help a lot as I was able to eat when I got home and hold [...]